file9211316340049

“Alone”

I closed my eyes.

Like a stubborn child I wanted to embrace the darkness that it offered; a brief respite from the terrible reality around me – engulfing me.

I didn’t want to see the hearse ahead, the words spelt out in flowers, the wooden box cradled between polished silver clamps. If I couldn’t see it, perhaps it wasn’t happening – I could hope for a moment that this was a nightmare. A terrible dream.

My mother sat stiffly opposite me, her broken arm in a black sling, her pity, and guilt, filling the car, until I couldn’t breathe.

I felt the gentle bump of the limousine; the warmth of John’s hand on mine. I ignored him when he squeezed my fingers – I couldn’t look at him. His broken heart mirrored mine and seeing it in his eyes and pale, drawn face, amplified the hurt and the pain.

The car slowed and turned. The sound of the indicator filled my head whilst the sharp shards of my heart ached. I shook - holding back a scream.

John squeezed my hand again, but his touch no longer felt warm.

The car stopped. He placed a cold arm around my shoulder. With his mouth close to my neck, his words ran a chill down my spine. “We’re here.”

I shivered and opened my eyes to the empty seats around me.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

23 comments on ““Alone”

  1. Sarah Patterson on said:

    Love this. Beautiful.

  2. David on said:

    Goodness, how can you say so much in so few words? Very good flash.

  3. Cherry on said:

    Oh… tears in my eyes! <3

  4. Sammy James Taylor on said:

    Nicely done. Tight flash which packs a lot in a small space.

  5. Camilla on said:

    Twisty :)

  6. Louise Broadbent on said:

    Touching and somehow creepy. Build up and ending work hand-in-hand. Great stuff.

  7. Carrie Clevenger on said:

    Tight and satisfying. I didn’t mean that in a dirty way. A great sample of your talent, Clive.

  8. Steve Green on said:

    A well-written piece capturing the atmosphere of the occasion.
    “If I couldn’t see it, perhaps it wasn’t happening.” An attempt to deny the facts, futile, but in grief we clutch at straws.

    The black sling was a very nice touch too.

  9. Natalie Bowers on said:

    Loved this line: The sound of the indicator filled my head whilst the sharp shards of my heart ached.

    It’s those funny little details – the sound of the indicator – that you remember from times like this, and that turn fiction into truth.

    Great twist at the end too.

    Sad and shocking.

    Nice one!

  10. Jen Brubacher on said:

    Oh, oh, oh. I got the shivers here. Yikes, Clive. You got me. Well built tension and quite a twist.

  11. tom gillespie on said:

    A moving, powerful piece that packs a very eloquent and precisely delivered punch. There is some fantastic descriptive writing in here.. and the agonizing truth of the moment cries out from the first line to the last.
    Beautiful!

  12. C Shipley on said:

    Awesome.

  13. Pingback: The #FridayFlash Report – Vol 3 Number 49 | Friday Flash

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

10,548 Spam Comments Blocked so far by Spam Free Wordpress

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>